Today
is the last day in which I shall contact you, and then I will becomes
as unknown to you as I have been for the last 20 years. When we met,
almost a year ago now, you were superficial and you said how glad you
were to see me and how now that you found me you would never lose me
again. And maybe in your home counties ways you believed what you
said at the time and perhaps you really wanted to known me in a
superficial and meaningless way. Or maybe you were being polite
cause you were caught unawares and that's what home counties boys do,
they say what they don't mean. You were so grateful to me for giving
your career a jump start blah blah blah . For fuck sake, I was
your lover, not the patron saint of careers...
Maybe
when you remembered me better you got angry with me or maybe I scare
you; maybe I bore you, or maybe you think I'm sad. Or maybe you just
wonder whatever did I see in that old bag. Maybe your life is just
fine because of who you have in it and maybe you just want me to fuck
off and you don't need the agro in your life..
Who
knows what another is, what another thinks, what another feels; what
their sadness is what their happiness is, what fills their waking
time.
To
be honest, my whole being simply over reacted at seeing you that day.
It fair did my head in and took me to places where no one my age
should have to go. Still, as hard as we try, we simply can't help
how we feel sometimes. Was I with the right man at the wrong time?
My neck hurts form having looked back so much this past year.
And
what the fuck am I talking about anyway, I was the bitch who left in
the first place; but it didn't take you long for you to get over your
broken heart. 6 weeks max? What does it matter anyway, it was, long,
long ago, so why are my feelings so raw now? This is getting
boring and it really isn't your problem anyway.
So
what to do now?
Well
I think I might just become a guru. I'll go out there into the world
and do my guruing here, there and everywhere. I can do my guruing
in blogging cyberspace to my hearts content and no one can stop me in
my anonymity. I can be as obscure and as unknown as I want.
Do
you think there is a parallel universe where a body meets a body and
the souls of the bodies know that the body is the right body and it
all happens at the right time? Utopia is far fetched, but who knows,
anything is possible.
So
I bath you in universal light and love (cause that's what wise,
anonymous, impersonal, worldly gurus do) and wish you what you wish
for yourself; and if my memory serves me right, is it celebrity and
fame? xx
Honor
Sterling
www.honorsgrain.blogspot.co.uk
05
April 2012
Post
on 30th
November 2012
Remember, remember 25th November?
Remember, remember 25th November?
This
accelerated blog has been possible through future time progression.
I can't hang about waiting for you to remember me....
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